Sunday 22 April 2012

From Humble Beginnings...

Welcome to the very first blog post. Lets get to know each other in the most intimate of ways possible (according to any good gossip magazine)... without make up!

Now, being a real humdinger of a pinup doesn't happen in a blink of a false eyelash, my dears. After my friend Rosie Button invited myself (and fellow vintage lover Agatha Frisky) to model for her classic pin up calendar photoshoot, I knew an early morning makeover was to be in order. Because I'm what you'd call a "thinking woman", I set my hair in curlers the night before.


 Good morning, beautiful! With a headful of pins and a fluorescent green robe, why wouldn't you sleep with a smile on your face?


Here is my stunning blank canvas, with somewhat of a healthy green glow. Where did that come from?


Stage one is what I refer to as Panel Beating. Smoosh some foundation into every nook and cranny, and dab concealer on to all the unwelcome face-dwellers. I'm all about technique.



I look a little more fabulous here, but you just can't put your finger on how. It's on the tip of your tongue... Eyelid contouring. Yup. Pin up makeup is the one time I bust out the brown eyeshadow.


Surprise! It's a beefy pair of eyebrows! Note that I've carried on my ginger masquerade to my pet caterpillars up there. Nobody will suspect the slightest!


The initial uncurling and half-hearted brushing! If you're attempting the stringy red-headed Einstein look, then ignore the following steps. There may also be a smear of rosy red rouge in there too. On my face, that is.


Phew! I recovered. My lack of formal training means that every hairstyle is a bit of a gamble, but there's rarely anything that a bit of back-combing and sneaky hair pin or two can't fix. Oh, and an atmosphere of hair spray.


Liquid eyeliner. Again, always a gamble, but I nailed it for my viewing audience. While you're waving the applicator around, why not slap on a beauty spot? 


Spot the beauty. It's harder than Where's Wally/Waldo/Volli/Hetti/Уолли.


Now, if your workspace doesn't end up looking like this, then you're probably not doing it right. 

Now that's what I call a TOTAL PHOTOGRAPHIC MIND BLOWING of my partial beautification process (you missed out the bit at the beginning where I sip on French Earl Grey [lucky guy] and eat some toast). I'm not going to post any spoilers from the photo shoot yet, but I'll put the finished product up. But I know you're itching for more, one final Ruby hit. So, snapped on location in the Fly By Night dressing room, I give you my second look for the day: Big Red Smiley Pout and Even Bigger Red Croissant On My Head (feat. messy dangly doo-dads). Now, since you saw me last I have obviously added a Big Scarlet Smirk, and a sweet set of false lashes for extra fluttery goodness. And a small pink bow.


I hope that you're feeling properly acquainted with me and my precious face now. Do stay tuned for more adventures, and DEFINITELY more photos. Of me. And maybe my cat.